Every week, Anna David answers your sex and romance questions in the safety and calm of our studios and she does a bang up job, but recently she decided to do something a bit different, something more raw and exciting. Rather than wait for you timid lambs to come to her with your sex questions, she decided to go to you.
Anna combed the streets of New York looking for curious souls with sex on the brain and she had no problem finding them. Indulge your voyeuristic side and allow yourself this one, lingering look into the hidden and erotic thought's of the Big Apple's most amorous and free spirited denizens.
My girlfriend’s “grooming” is not as thorough as it could be – and her lack of it kind of puts me off when it comes to certain things. What’s the best way to talk to her about it – or should I even bring it up?
There's really no tactful or perfect way to approach the whole pubic hair issue because it's a part of the body most women are self-conscious about. And while men may well have shrieked alongside Steve Carrell in The 40 Year Old Virgin, they really have no idea how much pain and planning and anxiety surrounds keeping that area just the way you guys like it. Adding to the complication is the fact that while some men like their women completely bare, others are thrilled with enough forest to create a fire. I say it's best to be direct on this matter; tell her what you like, assuming it's within reason (in my opinion, completely bare isn’t necessarily within reason) and assure her that you find her completely sexy no matter what she does. (You may also want to throw in a request that she tell you if she likes the hair you have in your nether region as well.) If she's not interested in discussing this or changing her ways, either suck it up or find yourself a woman who shares your preferences
Is it okay to be selfish sometimes in bed?
Actually, I think it is. Some women can really get off on watching their guy get turned it on, especially if she's the one responsible for it, as it's a way to be sexually involved and not feel any pressure whatsoever to orgasm. That doesn't mean, of course, that men should have full reign to expect all kinds of sexual favors and then do nothing in return; it just means that sex isn't tit for tat (or tit for pec). Still, if nothing's been discussed, many women who give you oral sex are going to be offended if you don't try to do something to her. My point is that you should discuss what you're doing with her. Bring up the possibility of her being your "slave" for the night or, even better, suggest taking turns -- having one night that's all about you and another that's all about her.
I want to try the “money shot.” Should I just go for it, or should I warn the girl?
I don’t think I'm overstating the case when I say that you have to ALWAYS warn the girl. While some women are all for (for lack of a better expression) porn sex, others aren't going to be remotely turned on by or even open to the idea of potentially getting splashed in the eye with your manhood. And is it really worth the risk of potentially completely offending a girl just to experience what the "money shot" is like? I say ask her if she's open to it. If she's not -- and she may well not be -- ask her if she's open to some other version of it (maybe she'd welcome your, uh, manhood, on her chest or stomach). If she's not feeling that and trying the money shot is of paramount importance to you, I'd suggest either getting an elaborate money shot fantasy going or somehow bedding a porn star (who may not be into it in her off time, anyway).