Cheats and Walkthroughs
Cheats and Walkthroughs
Even behind the brightest pixels, you can find some the darkest imagery in video games. Take for example the bubbly blonde cheerleader, Juliet Starling, of the upcoming Suda51 trip, Lollipop Chainsaw. She's also a chainsaw-wielding zombie slayer with a severed head for a boyfriend. The game is not even out yet, and it's teaching gamers a valuable lesson about judging an adorable book by its cover. Pretty packages can hide some particularly twisted imagery and gameplay. In the spirit of Lollipop Chainsaw, we've got five games that hide bloodshed, mayhem, or general depression and darkness behind a saccharine exterior – a bane to parents everywhere who don't know how to read ESRB ratings.
When he isn’t invited to a fellow bear’s soiree, our fur-lined anti-hero deals with this rejection in what is perhaps the unhealthiest manner, the mass murder of a quaint little community of bears. Naughty Bear is a sociopath. This once beloved toy arms himself with a variety of weapons: axes, pistols, baseball bats, you name it. He’s on a mission to punish each and every fluffy cuddle buddy on Perfection Island who ever dared to cross him. In 505 Games’ original IP Naughty Bear, you take up the mantle of the “naughtiest” bear of them all. He’s suffered humiliation and anguish at the hands of his so-called friends and neighbors, and it’s your job to ensure justice is served…in that psychotic, no-regard-for-others kind of way. Cuddly teddy bears eviscerate each other. Bury axes in each other's skulls. It's a veritable stuffed animal massacre. Too bad its premise was infinitely better than the meat of the game. Its cutesy antics, however, land it a guaranteed spot on our list, and at least for that reason it can be praised.
The name clearly alludes to that old adage “raising hell,” but the sugary sweet box art of Raze's Hell suggests a different story. The Kewletts, living in their own idyllic land of perfection, venture out at the edict of their Princess to purify the rest of the world outside their own little utopia. It's ugly, and it needs to be “cutified.” That's where you step into Raze's shoes, on a crusade to stop the seemingly innocent Kewletts. Another game whose concept outshined its poor critical reception, Raze's Hell fits our mold perfectly. The Teletubby-like Kewletts wield rocket launchers, machine guns, shotguns, sniper rifles, and practically anything else that’s rather unbecoming of something designed in pastel colors. They're not above suicide missions for their cause.
Conker's Bad Fur Day
Conker's Pocket Tales was a children's adventure game for the Game Boy and Game Boy Color. When Conker's Bad Fur Day was released via Nintendo 64, it transformed the kid-friendly squirrel into a binge-drinking, mouthy mess of a mammal. It also marked the greatest game of the mascot's career, aside from its later port of Bad Fur Day to the Xbox as Conker: Live and Reloaded. The “sequel” to Pocket Tales was a complete retooling and saw the squirrel toting shotguns, knives, and Conker's turning into an anvil interspersed with a typical platformer premise. For the uninformed, the 64MB cartridge release that touted a friendly squirrel and his girlfriend Berri was just another kiddie game. Fire it up and you'd be introduced to a raucous and raunchy tour de force with hilarious film parodies, talking poo, and lots of violence.
Primary colors, sunshine, a smiling little flower named Zee Tee, and cute platforming. It all seems like the perfect combination for this short independent game, right? Sure, until you realize Zee Tee can “evert” between two different realities, and the worlds become increasingly dark, disturbing, and downright virile. Enemies explode into globules of blood. A later level's soundtrack features that of a heartbeat pulsing. If you think that's bad, wait until you see the game's second and third endings. Eversion establishes its themes by way of a quote from H.P. Lovecraft at the beginning, but it quickly devolves into a nightmarish adventure that quickly subverts its happy-rainbow-sunshine trope.
It's all well and good to choose a Pokémon from Professor Oak (we're still kickin' it old school) and train to become a Pokemon Master. Did you ever stop to think about what the kid-friendly gloss of the multimedia powerhouse is hiding? The human race is enslaving and forcing beautiful creatures to beat each other senseless. Not to mention some of the creatures are downright terrifying. They can teleport, eat your dreams, and kill you with a mere thought. Take the story of Cubone. Coming from the words the words “cute” and “bone,” Cubone comes across as an adorable yet tough tyke in the Pokémon rooster. It’s only when you read the Pokedex do you find out that the skull that he wears on his head is that of his dead mother. It might be all fun and games when leaving Pallet Town for the first time in Pokémon, but it's also downright dangerous.
Did we overlook something? Let us know, if you aren't too scarred.