I am aware that this is more "product plug" than "proper news post." You know what? I don't care. It's not like I'm getting anything out of this beyond the basic satisfaction of sharing something exceedingly awesome with you most excellent readers of TheFeed.

Portal 2 introduced us to the charming, occasionally alarming wit of Cave Johnson, founder and CEO of Aperture Science, who was memorably brought to life thanks to some top-notch voice acting from J.K. Simmons. ThinkGeek has a way for you to enjoy Cave's wise words without turning on your console: the Cave Johnson Talking Portrait!

This little beauty of a holiday gift is sold out right now, but you'll hopefully be able to nab one at its $39.99 price when more are stocked in mid-December. The product listing notes that the portrait features 13 Cave utterances, "including the entire 'life gives you lemons' rant," as well as a most welcome on/off switch.

I don't want to speak for everyone here, but I definitely need one of these in my home immediately.