Bill O'Reilly Do It Live vs. Keyboard Cat Memefight
As we wind our way through G4tv.com’s month-long epic battle of Internet Memes called MEMEFIGHT, members of the staff will be picking key match-ups and taking sides. In this edition, Guest Contributor and Free Food Aficionado Alex Reveliotty will argue for Bill O'Reilly's famous 'Do it live!' rant, while G4tv.com's X-Play online producer James Elkin will take the side of Keyboard Cat.
ALEX: O’Reilly video wins not just on the merit of its hilarity and A+ quotability but because it’s also the epitome of one the top 10 reasons the internet is great; drudging up the people’s past (celebrity nudie pix being the other 9). Keyboard Cat is a man manipulating a cat to bang on a keyboard.
JAMES: I can’t vote for any meme that is essentially found footage, i.e. someone getting lucky having a camera pointed in the right direction at the right time. That’s just an extension of journalism, of the Weird and Wacky News department at your local Channel 9. If memes are to survive, they will have to be their own thing, so I here declare that I will always stand with the creative act over the one who says, “Here, I forgot to turn the camera off, enjoy it and make me "Meme King." I could be coming out against the Christian Bale rant, Antoine Dodson, or really any of the epic fails, but for here Bill O’Reilly it shall be.
ALEX: So basically what you saying is f*** it, you’ll do it live?
JAMES: Ah Alex, clever boy. I hope you and O’Reilly never change, endless source of laughter, if not creativity. But I must now discuss Keyboard Cat as a “creative act." And for that, I will not pull the rabbit out of the hat, but build up suspense and then walk away from the hat declaring it unimportant, and tell you that The Medium is The Message and we MUST epitomize that message whatever it may be. We MUST. And if we’re going to talk epitome of how internet diversion enters our lives, then you would have a hard time devising a more shining and indestructible example than Keyboard Cat. It is the chuckle that slowly turns to terror as you realize it’s not going anywhere. It is the carnival that comes to town and never leaves, ever. Learning to live with it becomes the only way to survive. Your morning walk for milk and eggs, once sober and cheerful, is now down a main street forevermore lined with dramatic chipmunks and dancing bananas; Sad Keanu waits at the bus stop. And there Keyboard Cat lords it over all - the opening notes of its ditty on endless loop across the sky – Daaa Da DAAA da daaa d-DA daa. We are all on Day 3,890 (when did Al Gore invent the internet?) of a cotton-candy-only diet. Day 1 fun is long past. We are wilted and in tears. We cry out for a carrot.
ALEX: Bro, are you ok? Honestly, how many great/silly/homemade cat videos are online in 2011? A million? Maybe more? Anyone can make a great cat video. We could literally get a cat and camera and make something today that would have 100,000 views by Sunday. Now how many top notch famous people losing it videos are online? 3, maybe 4? And O’Reilly’s video crushes all of them. Uniqueness is where any Keyboard Cat argument really falls apart.
JAMES: Keyboard Cat spawns disciples, O’Reilly inspires none. Sunday comes to pass, the latest cat video is nowhere near 100K, but the original reigns on. In the town’s newsroom O’Reilly yells at an employee, but in the town’s castle Keyboard Cat sits on the throne. Daaa Da DAAA da daaa d-DA daa. Nyan in the sky as below us our feet approach the edge. Daaa Da DAAA da daaa d-DA daa. Schoolchildren put down your textbooks and come along. There is nothing to see there. They are anyway made of sugar, their binding of high fructose goo. Daaa Da DAAA da daaa d-DA daa. Great leveler, faceless reflection of a nation’s soul. Daaa Da DAAA da daaa d-DA daa. The pursuit of happiness. Daaa Da DAAA da daaa d-DA daa. Melville’s white whale. Daaa Da DAAA da daaa d-DA daa. Who so would be a man. Daaa Da Daaa d-DA Da. We will not go quietly. Daaa Da DAAA da daaa d-DA daa.
ALEX: Dude I’m getting a heavy Silver Shamrock / HALLOWEEN 3 vibe off you and that cat. O’Reilly’s video has the added benefit of O’Reilly being a self- important blowhard bully. It’s always satisfying to see a jerk getting exposed. Even if you have no idea who O’Reilly is he just drips A-hole and 8 seconds into this video you already hate the guy. By the time he gets to his temper tantrum any well-adjusted human wants to see him fail and he delivers – spectacularly flaming out. This video also has the added bonus reminder that O’Reilly got his start on Inside Edition.
JAMES: Well clever boy, it’s in the voter’s hands now. Let me end with the cordiality that while I would never want to live in your world, I am happy to try coexistence with you in this one.
ALEX: The world of ratcheting ever higher meltdowns, the faux news guy smile between meltdowns, “F it, we’ll do it live!”, pencil toss / suit jacket fury or the world of James, Keyboard Cat, and those beeps and boops? I think I know where I want to live.
JAMES: Daaa Da DAAA da daaa d-DA daa.