If we've learned nothing from the recent death of a whale trainer at SeaWorld, we've learned that animals just want to kill us. Killer whales particularly. "Killer" is right in their name; which should be the first clue that you need to give them wide berth unless you're an Eskimaux* searching for lamp-oil.
To recap the gruesome tale, Killer whale Tilikum, A/K/A Tili, grabbed 40 year-old trainer Dawn Brancheau in his mighty jaws from a poolside platform, shook her and dragged her underwater, then swam through the pool carrying her until she drowned. All this in front of a packed crowd of horrified tourists.
Tillikum is no stranger to murder. The trainer was Tilly's third victim, but the whale's second kill was, amazingly, David Dukes, a man apparently so obsessed with Ultima creator Richard "Lord British" Garriott that he broke into Lord British's manor and had to be extracted by police.
According to Kotaku, in the late 1990s, Dukes was arrested in Austin, TX after a bat-crap crazy crime-spree that included stealing a Barbie doll, a briefcase and a women's camisole from a Target store, then punching a guy in the head at Joe's Generic Blues Bar, and finally breaking into Lord British's stately mansion.
British describes the man as an obsessed Ultima fan, and says he pulled a gun on the no-doubt wild-eyed drifter. Dukes ignored the piece and slept in British's bed. The cops came and arrested him.
Flash forward a few years-- Dukes made his way down to SeaWorld in Florida, broke into Tilly's water-logged tank in the middle of the night, and was found the next morning, torn apart.
The fate of Tili has yet to be determined, but can there be any answer other than euthanasia? Is there no three-strikes law for whales? Does no one possess the courage of Captain Ahab? According to SeaWorld officials, the murderous whale won't be "put down."
*I like spelling it like that.
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Displaying 1–17 of 17
Sovs
Ppl are stupid to mess with an animal that has killer in its name. Ppl are are even dumber to suggest humans are committing an evil crime against mother nature by keeping it at SeaWorld. I was honestly surprised they didnt put it down but I do not see a problem in keeping it alive. Any of those whales would kill a human being for one reason or another. Its not like Tilly is just a loose-cannon bad-ass renegade whale that doesn't play by the rules. Its just became pissed and/or hungry. So yes ppl are dumb to go too far with a whale, but you are stupid to presume if we just sit down with the animal kingdom over tea that all will be well in the world. They are animals as are we so they play by the Darwin theory. Its not like they some sentiment to us, they would kill us in a heartbeat.
silent_jedi
So, who is going to rise to power first, the robots or the killer whales/dolphins? Woe to us all if they so decide to join forces.
Chewbaca_The_Wookie
Screwing with a killer whale... Thats gotta be at least an honorable mention for the Darwin Awards.
lookatthisguy
I agree with Mister_Sr (and btw kudos for the Jack Bauer avatar) but I want my comment to be seen explicitly so I won't post this as a reply to his comment.
You've got to be pretty friggin' stupid to read the headline to the article and NOT see where it's going, so those of you complaining "Oh but Stephen, this is a video game site, not an animal news site" need to think a little more. If the article was really such a waste of your time, why'd you finish reading it and take the time to post a comment complaining about wasting your time? I mean, I'm no time analyst or expert or nothin', but it seems to me that would take even more of your precious time to do whatever it is you do.
I kinda like saying the word 'time' now.
iva slasher
Orca is one of my all time favorite films!!!
Mister_Sr
Wow you guys stop hating on the article. It was meant as a joke to lighten up the mood. I thought it was kinda funny and a bit interesting and by no means a bad article. So today maybe a little slow for gaming news so what. Relax guys it was meant as a joke and if you can not see that than you are pathetic.
jtrain47
In my never-ending quest to offend everyone i possibly can, I think I can do myself good right here.... So here it goes....
"NUKE THE UNBORN, GAY WHALES!!!!"
Thoughts?
GreedyMcNasty
Another reason why we should kill them all. Let's start whale hunting these bad boys and kill them to death. Let's make them like the DOO DOO BIRD.
sneakerz
I dont feel that the whale should be put down. the creature is a wild animal and should be left alone in his own environment. We as humans are facinated by wildlife and tend to capture these creatures confine them and force them to jump and do tricks so we can laugh and enjoy performance and show that we as humans can force other living things do what we want them to do. The whale is probably tired of bieng caged up. He needs to be in his own habitat, but because the whale killed 3 or 4 people we are judging the creature and saying "Oh he commited murder lets put him down" that whale does not know any better and is acting naturally. If i was that whale i would kill humans too, if i was forced to do tricks at seaworld. Let the animal go and let him try to survive on his own even after so many years in captivity. Thats just my own 2 cents.
SonicATL
Killer whale going psycho on three humans? That's (somewhat) normal. Keeping that same whale in (and at) the scene of those attacks should tell the trainers and staff "This one doesn't like it here." I'd either let Tili go or hand her over to the Japanese to curb their whaling appetite.
darkhadden
Steve, why did the Kotaku story say the man was asleep on the whale and you've reported he was torn asunder? Which is it? You've stated 'from Kotaku' so are you taking ironic liberties??
IamtheBat
I have never seen the excitement in dolphin or any other other orcapod animal centered show. I think people like them just due to the fact that they look like they are smiling and give live birth. I think they should replace all of these shows with Walrus/Manatee/Otter shows, take it there wont be as many loops and aerial acrobatics, but the "Awwww" factor will be amazing and no one will die.
but back to the true point, this has nothing to do with vidya G4 : /
Rayzorshark
What got to me, while I was watching the coverage of this event on CNN, was how everyone was describing this event as "shocking".
It seems incongruous that anyone would be surprised that an animal with word "killer" in it's name might do harm to human beings.
Thoreauvian
This story made my head hurt. I had no idea where it was going, and after reading it, I'm not sure what I just read. Bizzare! The way this story kept spiraling towards obscurity, I was waiting for the reveal that Tillikum had ties with the Knights Templar.
Carnage_Asada
I agree. It's not that that whale hates gamers. What the hell kind of reporting is that? The guy went in to the whale tank and probably did something to agitate the whale and ultimatly ended his pathetic obsessive life. Thats not the whale's fault, its the douche who thought, "I'm going to break into a killer whales tank afterhours and do some crazy off the wall stuff that I deem normal. Huzzah!"
You'd figure with these deaths, people would take a step back and say, "Ya know, I think I would die to a killer whale, I better notmess with them."
...Then again, there are idiots like that guy.
shmaron
They should be called "Killer big-ass dolphins" since they're considered a part of the dolphin spiecies.
topgamer101
Ok I like you guys here at G4, but do you honestly have nothing else to talk about but a killer whale? The fact that this story has an extremely loose tie in to gaming has very little reason to be reporting on it.
As a side note, there is a reason they are called KILLER whales, I'm sure.
Displaying 1–17 of 17