It's Tuesday, and that means it's time for me to tell you what music, DVDs and Blu-Rays you might want to pay attention to this week. Aren't you lucky?
I usually I focus on music that is good, or at least notable, this week I'm not going to. Instead, I'm going to tell you about music from a pair of reality TV stars. I think I'm angry at you or something.
Brooke Hogan: The Redemption -- Brooke Hogan is famous for being the daughter of a broken down wrestler who used to be popular back when everyone was too ignorant to know any better. Her album is full of anonymous, pop and R&B tunes that will be enjoyed by fools, douches and jokes all over the nation. Featured guests include Flo-Rida (who I actually sort of like), $tacks, and Urban Mystic. The most important guest, though, is Brooke's auto-tuner. It almost manages to make Brooke Hogan listenable. Almost.
Of special note is the cover, where Hogan styles herself like the air-brushed angel on the back of a van from the 1970s. An Angel! Seriously! Please, do not buy this album. In fact, if you do decide to buy this album, you are forbidden from reading anything I write ever again--we just don't have enough in common.
Daughtry: Leave This Town This guy was on American Idol, so, he can't possibly rock. Sure, his music makes a lot of noise--the guitars are loud; the drums are loud; he sings like a rock guy--but this isn't rock. It's tunes for orthodontists in Audis. It's over-produced, non-offensive, slick and heartless -- music for people who don't know any better. Please do not buy this album.
The DVD releases this week will follow a similar theme to the music releases: Basically, these are movies about people out of their element.
Ryan and Sean's Not So Excellent Adventure: In real life, Ryan Higa and Sean Fujiyoshi make YouTube videos. They have millions of subscribers, and now they have a feature film. With a title ripped off from another movie, this flick is about the young internet-stars trying to produce hit, mainstream content. I'm I wonder if they're going to be successful.
A Haunting In Connecticut: Who could have guessed that the stately New England home in which this movie is set holds an ancient evil? Okay, this isn't the best horror movie ever made, but it's far from the worst. The story of a sick boy and his encounters with spooky ghosts is an effective little haunted house tale, if you don't go into it with huge expectations. It's definitely the best horror movie to come out on DVD this week, anyway.
Taipei 101 Fireworks: Sometimes you just need a disc to show off your system, and this collection of highly-defined fireworks is just the ticket. Plus, you'll be able to have fireworks any time the smallest victory is achieved. Finished doing laundry, give yourself some sky-rockets!