Pics of the Playmates action figure line for Terminator Salvation have hits "teh interwebs" today. If you are anal about spoilers, you may not wish to click the "Read More" button. On the other hand, for those of you who are NOT weak-willed pansies that eat Kashi cereal in the morning, drink soy milk, and sleep in panic a room, CLICK IT...I DARE YOU!
**Hard Guitar Rock Music Plays** New Terminator Salvation action figures!
Watch John Connor take out a bunch of T-600 prototypes with his trusty Connor-mobile! (Action figures sold separately.) He hates to "hit and run" but he's got other Termantors to terminate!
Hey look, it's our friend, Marcus Wright! Wait, he's actually a Terminator! No problem! Barnes aka rapper Common will just upload a copy of his latest album into his CPU! Terminators hate hip-hop! It makes them "get jiggy wit it" too hardcore and they explode!
They look like men, but they're NOT! Some look like they want to assimilate you into the Borg collective, others just want to beat you brutally with a giant pipe or steel beam! Damn those machines! What have we done?! WHAT...HAVE...WE...DONE?!
Available in action figure aisles this spring right between the Littlest Pet Shop and Tickle Me Elmo.
(To break the fourth wall a bit:) It is actually not a ridiculous assumption to infer that these will be in toy aisles considering the involvment of Playmates (best known for the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Star Trek lines that were popular in the 90's.) Most "mature" action figure lines are made either by McFarlane or sold directly online. These have "movie merchandise" written all over them. A few of the Terminator endoskeleton figures look decent enough to grace a shelf, but the human characters look craptacular to say the least. The faces render them unrecognizable and the articulation looks awkward as the closed leg, "stick up the butt" look of the non-premium WWE figures does not do anyone any favors. I'm not even sure how they are going to put out that HK Tank (which is NOT the "Connor-mobile" btw.)