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Ninjas Arrested In New Jersey

Posted by Stephen Johnson - Friday, August 22, 2008 12:04 PM

Those young scamps pictured above can't stop thinking about ninjas. Twenty year-old Tadeusz Pertkiewicz and 19-year-old Jesse Trojaniak recently donned the all-black garb of The Shinobi warrior, gathered up some throwing stars, smoke bombs, nun chucks and katanas, and set out to clean up the mean streets of Clifton, New Jersey from the menace of suburban drug dealers.

Of course, the police arrested the pair immediately, before they had a chance to fight crime and/or hit themselves on the head with their nun chucks. The pair were picked up by the po-po after delivering a letter to a suspected drug dealer that read, in part, "Shinobi will stop your cruel and sadistic intentions with justified, yet merciful force" and accused drug users and dealers of "committ[ing] sin of passing impurity" to others.

Local drug dealers were not available for comment, but we're sure they're relieved that the pair were arrested. They obviously would have ended the drug-scourge plaguing Clifton.

On a related note: Ninjas are totally sweet. My friend Mark said that he saw Tadeusz Pertkiewicz totally uppercut some kid just because the kid opened a window.




Comment(s)

Posted by Smartguy81 - Friday, August 22, 2008 12:37 PM

You can't make something like this up.

Posted by mr_piffingt0n - Friday, August 22, 2008 12:46 PM

I read da same article in my local paper dis mornin nd couldn't stop laughin cuz they went 2 da same high school I went 2. I actually think da younger 1 is my neighbor. Lmao.

Posted by idlebutdeadly - Friday, August 22, 2008 12:49 PM

OH come on! you had smoke bombs! use them!

Posted by blakseed - Friday, August 22, 2008 12:51 PM

L. M. A. O.

Posted by cxhxexexsxe - Friday, August 22, 2008 12:51 PM

that is definitely something i would do

Posted by Slash5150 - Friday, August 22, 2008 12:51 PM

Okay...sword vs gun, who would win in REALITY.

Posted by lightsaber1985 - Friday, August 22, 2008 12:52 PM

Getting caught by the police first night out, not very ninja-ish.

A = Effort, F = Execution.......FAIL!!!!!!!!!

Posted by rinokwedjnfalwa - Friday, August 22, 2008 12:53 PM

They give a bad name to all the real ninjas fighting drug dealers in New Jersey.

Posted by panzerfist - Friday, August 22, 2008 12:56 PM

They probably won't get in too much trouble except for being in possesion of weapons because it was for their own sake that they were caught. The police arrest vigilanties because they tend to get themselves killed because they don't know what they're doing. Now had they listed themselves as bounty hunter ninjas....

Posted by Oinkness - Friday, August 22, 2008 1:05 PM

It's a good thing they jailed the ninjas and left the drug dealers on the street. :D

Posted by lightsaber1985 - Friday, August 22, 2008 1:18 PM

Getting caught by the police first night out, not very ninja-ish.

A = Effort, F = Execution.......FAIL!!!!!!!!!

Posted by altizar - Friday, August 22, 2008 1:22 PM

Gun Vs. Sword

Senario 1) Sword wins, ever seen a rapper try to shoot anyone and hit them?

Senario 2) 10th Sword wins, you run out of ammo eventualy.

Senario 3) Sword wins, even decent shooters aren't that great at moving targets.

Senario 4) Gun Wins, It has to happen eventually.

So Sword vs Gun, Sword wins 75% of the time. . .

Posted by Ieyke - Friday, August 22, 2008 1:28 PM

Now I'm gonna go assume these guys weren't actual ninjas. If we were to go do some vigilante justice there wouldn't be a letter to tip them off and there'd be no way to stop us. Ironically Batman Begins is a pretty realistic way of how ninjas would do it.

Posted by Sovien - Friday, August 22, 2008 1:29 PM

@ Oinkness

lol that was my first thought as well.

Posted by SkeeteRX8 - Friday, August 22, 2008 1:34 PM

Yeah, they could have gone to the Willowbrook Mall or something...I don't blame them..clifton is a boring town!

Posted by Hueso - Friday, August 22, 2008 1:40 PM

Sorry dudes, you give REAL Ninjas a bad name. We (I mean), real Ninjas don't use letters to tell our (excuse me) the bad guys that we (dammit) Ninjas are comming after them...nor do we (oh well that cat's out the bag)...yes we, don't get caught. You guys suck. Better luck next time though...if you ever reach California, look us up. We will teach you how it's really done.
Damn, smoke bombs that weren't even used...that's real bad (beyond bad). Your sensei (if you have one) is gonna laugh at that.

Posted by milhouse91 - Friday, August 22, 2008 1:54 PM

Ninja please!

realultimatepower.net

Posted by paranoic - Friday, August 22, 2008 2:08 PM

This just set a new standard for stupidity.

Posted by SithLordNitsu - Friday, August 22, 2008 2:29 PM

@mr_piffingt0n

man your out of high school? With that grammar I would have thought you were still in.

Posted by deathsdelivery - Friday, August 22, 2008 2:33 PM

Dumb crackers!
LoL

Posted by LOAGEEKS (BANNED) - Friday, August 22, 2008 3:12 PM

Did the "Drug Dealers" alert the cops of the letter they got from these two guys?

They weren't ready, they still had lots more to learn from Master Splinter.

Posted by sdc10 - Friday, August 22, 2008 3:22 PM

only in jersey

Posted by Mean_Old_Man - Friday, August 22, 2008 3:25 PM

It is probably a good thing they got caught or this story would be about two dead boys dressed as ninjas. Next time one of them should dress up as Zorro and the other one can dress up as Zorro the gay blade and perhaps not send out notices before cleaning up the streets.

Posted by mEm00t - Friday, August 22, 2008 3:27 PM

@mr_piffingt0n what the hell was that? Did you deliberately type that badly? I really don't know what it was you said but don't answer the door as Ninja's are outside waiting to beat some literacy into you.

Posted by zrcous - Friday, August 22, 2008 4:05 PM

HAHAHA REAL ULTIMATE POWER!!! how am i the only one who noticed this? one time a ninja killed a whole town just because someone dropped their spoon.

Posted by burntice - Friday, August 22, 2008 5:04 PM

Somewhere, Ryu Hayabusa is having an epic face-palming session.

Posted by hellrazer360 - Friday, August 22, 2008 6:50 PM

deathsdelivery is a black man and i dont like him

Posted by coolperson - Friday, August 22, 2008 6:50 PM

So they got arrested by cops for trying to do the cops' dirty work? I can see why the cops wouldn't want two kids trying to stop drug dealers, but did they really have to arrest them? And did they not arrest the drug dealers? They should have just arrested the drug dealers so the kids they arrested wouldn't be trying to get the drug dealers because they'd already be in jail. Pretty stupid cops if you ask me.

Posted by galvan - Saturday, August 23, 2008 11:00 AM

well what what kinda drug dealers...lol

if they only sold weed its all good....go get the other people who sell dat white stuff....that stuff is no good....and pills and acid,shrooms,k sticks, so on and so forth yadig

Posted by deathsdelivery - Saturday, August 23, 2008 11:14 AM

hellrazer360 is a dickhead and I don't like like him.

I believe you were one of those idiots on the soulja boy/youtube post, typing racist 5hit,
so I was just trying to figure out you would be stupid enough to fall for this trap(YOU)..

Posted by hellrazer360 - Thursday, August 14, 2008 1:19 PM
lol,blacks.


So look at both our statments and tell me one is better than the other.No.
My god-father, whom I have grown up with all my life is white, I hate/hate on a person for their actions, not the ethnicity,
your clearly one of those 360 online racist that helped make me dislike the brand.
Thank God not all white people are str8 dicks like you, and thank God I don't find it beneficial to generalize a race off the actions of their others, otherwise I would lynch all white dudes and rape white women and make them work for nothing.and beat the 5hit out of them.

Posted by blakseed - Sunday, August 24, 2008 8:04 AM

@Deathsdelivery
Amen.

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