Surprise: Jack Thompson Hates 'GTA IV'

Here's a shocker for you: It looks like famous attorney (and TV videogame expert!) Jack Thompson hates Grand Theft Auto IV, so much so that he thinks those responsible for the game should be arrested in real jail for pretend crimes. He wrote this to his local US Attorney:

Indictments should be returned against Take Two corporately and its Chairman, Strauss Zelnick, along with other Take Two officers. Indictment should also be against Sony and Microsoft which are making this pornographic game available to minors, and openly so, on their PS3 and Xbox systems.

Further, indictments should be handed down against Wal-Mart, Best Buy, GameStop, and all other retailers distributing this game to minors at their retail stores, openly, to kids who are only seventeen.

And then the kicker:

Grand Theft Auto IV is the gravest assault upon children in this country since polio.

Hey, Jack, you know who else had polio?

That's right, Franklin Delano Roosevelt, beloved 32nd President of the United States. Using our logical skills, we can only conclude that the ghost of FDR is in president heaven right now, playing Grand Theft Auto IV and twirling his cigarette holder.

Gamepolitics: Jack Thompson Claims GTA IV is Porn and Everyone Should Be Indicted