Why spend money at a massage parlor when Panasonic wants to relieve your tension with their new "Luxury-Class Real Pro Ultra Massage Chairs"?

How good are these chairs? Well, without ever sitting in and using one, let's do a tech review based on the advertising speak from the press release:

• Luxury-Class: This says that the chair is a luxury and should not be confused with a necessity. There are a lot of other expensive, frivolous massage chairs on the market, but those are for people who need them. These chairs are strictly luxury purchases and should be enjoyed as such.
• Real: These chairs exist in our time-space continuum.
• Pro:  Don't be fooled by amateur massage chairs (that may also be fake) masquerading as professionals. Be sure to ask for a chair's credentials before sitting down.
• Ultra: This means that the chair is suitably extreme for the person that wants to sit back and relax for an "ultra-fine massage to relieve muscle tension via a high-speed circular massage motion" on the edge, man! Easy there, killer. That chair is ultra!
• Massage Chairs: These chairs will provide a massage.

This is just the type of product one would find at a place like The Sharper Image. Good thing one of the models (EP30006) is available exclusively at The Sharper Image for $4799.00.

The most important question is, when will this chair be available from SkyMall?