Hey, Michael Vick: TheFeed knows that you’re feeling down and all after your incident in Miami last week. So, to help you get over it and back to the very serious business of coach-killing, we’re going to pass along this story of an even more bone-headed air travel stunt pulled by an Australian ass-clown at Melbourne’s airport.
Reports say that Allen Jasson is shocked and chagrined and considering taking legal action against Qantas airlines because the airline would not allow him to board a flight from Melbourne to London while wearing his hip, stylish “George W. Bush # 1 Terrorist” T-shirt.
Even better: the likely descendant of criminals had already been denied the right to board a domestic flight days earlier for wearing the very same shirt.
To the genius Mr. Jasson, TheFeed would like to address the following:
Hey, mate, we think it’s great you’re all political and stuff. We bet you’re a lot of fun at parties. In fact, we’d really like to get you and The Nuge together in the same room, just to see what would happen. It is, after all, important to stand up for what you believe in, even if what you believe in amounts to little more than inflammatory ideological sloganeering. But, if you actually thought it would be a great idea to wear a shirt emblazoned with the word “terrorist” on a passenger aircraft, well, you’re kind of a dumbass.
So, in the interest of helping you to avoid any future entanglements at the gate, we’ve decided to take the reigns and highlight a couple of other wardrobe choices you may want to avoid in your further jet-setting adventures:
This little number is attitude personified. Its poly-blend fibers wisk away moisture and keep you warm in the winter, cool in the summer, and fashion-forward year-round. Keep in mind, though, that airport security workers are no pushovers. They will likely see this as a clever attempt at reverse psychology on your part and assume you are a real terrorist trying to trick them.
This T is “the bomb” and would be a bad-ass shirt to wear to the park, or perhaps the pub for drinks after a long week on the job. Its simple design says “modern” and “devil-may-care” in most settings. However, at the airport security checkpoint, it says, “ready the ass-batons.” Keep this one in the closet at home when traveling by air.
Perhaps you might try wearing a tie next time. Or, maybe you could drown in the delicious irony of wearing a Michael Vick jersey through the checkpoint. Bombs, terrorism, and the like are nothing to joke about at the airport. But pot is hi’larious.
7Online.com: Qantas boot man for wearing Bush shirt