Q: My question is; is it always the guy's responsibility for initiating the second date? Don't laugh; but if a woman truly enjoyed my company, I don't mind, and honestly would prefer, she called me.

My other question: How does one handle the dinner check? Both of us are independent. My background says the man always pays, but will it offend her if I insist on paying?

Sticking to My Comfort Zone

A: There are no steadfast dating rules or roles these days. On the upside, this gives each party complete freedom to say and do what he or she wants, fostering more genuine and less manipulative behavior. On the downside, with the partial demise of gender dating roles comes some degree of dating-related confusion.

Most of us would prefer to hang around in our comfort zone while the other party took the romantic responsibility and risk. Few of us actually enjoy this luxury. Dating is about the giving of reassurances and the taking of risks. Both parties should participate in this process. It's certainly not your responsibility to initiate the second date. However, if you want the date, why not just ask? Just remember to always graciously take "no" for an answer.

In answer to your other question:
Never bicker over a tab. When you ask someone out on a date, you should always be prepared to pick up the tab. If your date offers to split it, accept the offer. And when in doubt about the proper protocol, pick up the check. If you err in one direction, it should certainly be on the side of generosity.