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The Onions Vs. Iran

Attack of the Show

Not everyone--including countries and states--realizes that The Onion is all about satire. Dave Holmes talks to writers Seth Reiss and Will Tracy about how the people of Iran and Florida confused...

Posted: Oct 3, 2012
News

The Onion: Mind Vacations Are The Affordable Summer Getaway Solution

Today Now!: Save Money By Taking A Vacation Entirely In Your Mind Our country may be going through a fiscal crisis at the moment, but here's one way to stay calm and enjoy the sights without...

Posted: Aug 10, 2011
News

The Onion: New Social Security Reform Act

Social Security Reform Bill Encourages Americans To Live Faster, Die Younger "Grab life by the balls" is my new motto. And I know how to do this, thanks to the Seize Testicles move! For...

Posted: Jul 26, 2011 | 1 Comment
News

The Onion Debate Over R Rated Movies

Should Adults Be Allowed To Bring Kids To R-Rated Movies Where We Masturbate? So where do you stand on this very important debate? For more viral videos, tune into Attack of the Show every...

Posted: Jul 19, 2011
News

The Onion Reports On Beyonce/JAY-Z's Baby

When you're as talented as Beyonce is, the only reasoning behind it is having met a witch when you were young. Now, a toll must be paid. For more viral videos, watch Around the Net on Attack of...

Posted: Jan 11, 2012
News

The Onion Analyzes President Obama's Profanity Filled Speech

In The Know Panel Analyzes Obama's Furious, Profanity-Filled Rant At Nation Sometimes I wish The Onion was about real news because this would have been amazing. For more viral videos, watch Around...

Posted: Feb 8, 2012
News

The Onion's Hottest Holiday Gifts

Chinese Paint Tops List Of This Year's Must-Have Holiday Gifts Remember when the Tickle Me Elmo dolls were insanely popular one holiday season? This year, it's all about Chinese paint. For more...

Posted: Dec 7, 2011
Show Segment

Dave Holmes On Phone Spying, Bad Box Sets, & Iran

Attack of the Show

Dave Holmes catches you up on the latest newsworthy items, like the Android app that can help hackers spy on your life, the worst box sets you can buy and how Iran failed to understand an Onion...

Posted: Oct 2, 2012
News

Pigeons Hanging Out At Burger King

"To be honest, my Whopper was a bit dry and the onions rings tasted like they'd been sitting in the heater for a while. I'm not gonna complain, though, considering that my dinner yesterday...

Posted: May 16, 2012
News

Chewbacca Burger

Clearly, this person took the old adage, "let the Wookie win" to mean "let him cook until he's well done and rubbery." Nevertheless, armed with an onion and ketchup bandolier,...

Posted: Feb 10, 2012
News

Condiment Paradox

This has to be a violation of some type of implied natural law. What's next? Relish in the onion containers? Onions in the relish containers? Unsuspecting people whose only crime was not being...

Posted: Sep 20, 2012
News

Recipes From the GWAR-B-Q!

As you saw on AOTS, Candace Bailey spent a little time with the immortal demon metal band GWAR at their GWAR-B-Q not too long ago on the East Coast, but what did they cook? Luckily, we were able to...

Posted: Oct 4, 2011
News

He's Stolen Too Many Picnic Baskets

"I'll be honest. While as a bear, nature has tasked me with chasing you and attempting bite off your head, I'm just way too tired to even think about that. Frankly, I'm already exhausted from...

Posted: Aug 28, 2012
News

Inspired By McRib: Other Limited Fast Food Items We Want Back!

There's a lot of hype surrounding this iteration of the return of McDonalds's McRib sandwich, which, it seems, comes and goes about every six months or so these days, and it got us thinking about...

Posted: Oct 26, 2011
News

Sin City 2 Gets Release Date, Details Revealed

The long-anticipated sequel to 2005's conceptual, groundbreaking comic book adaptation, Sin City is finally confirmed to go. Not only has it been announced that director, Robert Rodriguez is...

Posted: May 18, 2012