May 14, 2007

Today's the day. Today's the day when our lives are supposed to change. I wonder if they mean whatever it is will affect our "work lives" or our regular lives. Usually when someone at work says our lives are going to change it means we're getting a new brand of coffee or another vending machine. Which can be pretty life changing now that I think of it.....like...what if you don't like the coffee? That would make me really sleepy all the time. So very, very, very sleepy.

May 11, 2007

TGIF! Jerry and I finished the first level for "Divide and Conquer" today. For a dorky math game it's going to be alright. If you forget about the remainder the division sign turns into a guillotine and chops your head off. That was totally my idea. Awesome. Still wish I was working on Hooker Patrol....I think boss Larrity gave it to Todd another douchebag programmer here. Todd basically sucks. Like, really, really bad.

May 10, 2007

OK OK...so we said Bar Fight and CrossWalk were coming soon. Soon is a subjective term I guess. Anyway...they are almost finished...I know this because I programmed them myself and they look pretty sweet.....all the blood splatter and decapitations were done by yours truly. We just hired this chick named Mary. She seems to know what she's talking about...unlike Clare. Stupid frumpy Clare. I wonder if Mary likes porno?

May 9, 2007

I've been re-assigned to a new game called "Divide and Conquer". It's one of those super-lame "learny" games but at least I'm working with Jerry on it. He's another programmer here. We're trying to figure out a way how to add blood or topless women somehow. Apparently they're using GameAVision in some TV show......all I know is that I better get some royalties out of it. Show me the money, bitch!

May 8, 2007

We're preparing for something big. Something that will change our lives forever. I wish it was a wild, spontaneous orgy between our female co-workers. Except for Clare...she's a little too "frumpy" for my taste. Plus she talks too much. Usually to my boss about the things I'm doing wrong. Stupid frumpy Clare. Bar Fight is getting ready to ship. I think a lot of people are going to enjoy it. My suggestion to ship it with a 6-pack and an action-smashable bar stool didn't go over too well though.

Dave

May 7, 2007

We're putting the finishing touches on Cross Walk and it should be ready to launch any day now! We're considering a marketing stunt where we kidnap all the crossing guards in the area forcing the school kids to cross the streets on their own. Welcome to adulthood, suckers! Larrity came through the office today and tried to have us all sign these weird releases. Something about agreeing to sign over the entirety of something in the event of whatever. What am I, a lawyer?

Dave

May 4, 2007

Thanks to all of you out there who have been emailing us and checking out the site...it's already crashed a few times. I guess we should upgrade from our current server which is basically a calculator with some tinfoil wrapped around it. We'll have some info about where to pick up our games soon. Also, lots of people are asking "WTF is Gameavision?" I just say "If you have to ask you'll never know!" But I like messing with people so...there you go. Check out the new trailer for our latest game "Bar Fight"! We just uploaded it to the site. I've got to get back to work...boss has me working on another new game, Hooker Patrol, which is about, well...if you have to ask you'll never know.

Dave
Head Programmer, GameAVision