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Kristen Stewart Explains Valentine's Day

Posted February 14, 2012 - By Joseph Baxter

After explaining Christmas, impressionist, Laura McDonald is back as expression-impaired ingenue, Kristen Stewart.

This time, Twilight's mopey wannabe-vampire recounts for us the "romantical" story of one "Dave Valentine" and how his heart-shaped, candy-swilling holiday came to be.

If there's one thing we can take out of this epic tale, it's that "Claudius Part II" was a d**k. -- And a Sith Lord.