Food and Drink

Renting U-Hauls is for wusses who like to drink fancy coffees and order stuff that's not on the dollar menu at fast food restaurants.

Real men will do whatever it takes to lug that load in one trip, even if it kills anyone with the misfortune to be stuck behind him on a skinny road.

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I'm not sure what specifics go into the process of wang-seasoning, I just know that seaweed tastes funky enough as it is.

Maybe they're marketing this flavor as some kind of aphrodisiac. In which case, some guys might welcome a low-cost, edible Viagra alternative. (Not me, but OTHER guys who need it would, mind you.)

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I guess this could actually be a public service announcement warning people that if you don't put a condiment on your hot dog, you're gonna get AIDS by default.

Well, people always say that you never want to see how the hot dog is actually made...

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Who needs Wienerschnitzel or Nathan's Famous? Those places are for fancy-schamcy people who like their hot dogs without characters from The Lord of the Rings.

For those who have made the logical conclusion that hot dogs and Lord of the Rings are an impeccable coupling, there is this place, whose chilli dogs are so potent, you'll need to return it to your own flushable Mount Doom within an hour.

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If you're going to post fast food reviews on YouTube, this is how you do it.

For more viral videos, watch Around the Net on Attack of the Show every weeknight at 7/6c!

One of the many downsides of being a vegetarian was having to miss out on the deliciousness of animal entrails, along with other miscellaneous parts whose biological purpose science hasn't quite nailed.

Well, necessity being the mother of invention, now veg-heads finally have a shot at enjoying the cooked poo-tubes of our barnyard brethren.

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This dish will only work if the hearts of these vegetables are affluent enough, which creates the delicious char that carries the flavor.

However, when this process is done in vain, there seems to be a richer, more decadent taste.

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"Mmmm. I LOVE jerky! Lemme at that!

**sniff, sniff** Oh, it's that artificial low-fat stuff. -- Yeah...you know, it's damnedest thing, but I've suddenly lost my appetite. So, no thanks to that.

Nope, I shan't be having a piece. -- NOPE! NOPE! NOOOPE!"

Fresh corn dogs straight from the deep-fryer are for fancy people who drive Honda Civics and use words like "magnificent."

However, when you know how to get your calorie-coated snacks on a budget, minor cosmetic issues like rips, tears, and severed fingers are a small price to pay.

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It looks like this place has come up with the perfect combination of good old-fashioned meaty Americana and nutty-chocolatey goo that's conducive for writing haiku on your iPad at the local Starbucks while feeling self-satisfied.

Clearly, a ten pound bun was required to contain the sweet-bacon-synthesis from affecting the triglyceride levels of nearby innocent bystanders.

Oh, Nutella, is there anything that you DON'T go with?

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