Sports

This banner is either sporting a horrible misspelling or it's a specialty nursery school designed for tomorrow's strippers.

Regardless, it's certainly a place where your little tots where learn the fundamentals of the alphabet, numbers, and how to dry-hump a pole while hanging upside-down.

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An Internet PSA filmed by students from 1995 has predicted all the crazy things that we're now able to do on on the world wide web, like check sports scores and go shopping. Isn't that amazing? Are these kids magical or what?

For more viral videos, watch Around the Net on Attack of the Show every weeknight at 7/6c!

"Oh, don't mind me, sports fans.

I'll rid you of this maddening monarch so that you can get back to your game in peace. I don't mind, in fact, it even grabs me a snack in the process. -- There. You see?

I'll leave you to your fancy game of kicking round objects into nets."

Super Dog reveals that this intensive French sport isn't just limited to humans.

For more viral videos, watch Around the Net on Attack of the Show every weeknight at 7/6c!

Apparently, the massive TV coverage of the Olympics from the past few weeks missed the moment when an escaped alien creature posing as a diver became exposed and attempted to kill and absorb the judges after a bad score.

Luckily, the Chinese swim team had a flamethrower on hand and torched the abomination.

Why did they have a flamethrower? Just because. -- Just because.

[Source]

In the midst of a competitive Olympic wrestling event, it's incumbent upon a referee to find "alternative methods" to examine the participants for performance-enhancers and doping.

The Ukrainian in the blue singlet turned out to be clean, although an all-night bender of Taco Bell made the testing process unpleasant.

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The prissy people who run the Olympics may shun man vs. bear wrestling competition, but in Russia, it's the second-biggest sport, just behind testicle juggling.

This proverbial chess match against nature may have ended in a stalemate, but there's always another day.

It wasn't so much the cape that provoked this bull, but rather, that ridiculous rat tail the woman was sporting.

She would have tried to move out of the way, but frankly, she thought it was a rare opportunity to find a male strong enough to sweep her off her feet...literally.

...And after the werewolves eat the gold medal winner and run off in terror from your badass silver, you, by default, are the new gold medal winner!

Who ever said that being second place just makes you the first loser? Probably someone who's never been attacked by werewolves.

[Source] (Modified for format.)

If falling on your ass backwards on a diving board, springing into a head-first reverse-cannonball was somehow an Olympic sport, then this girl would...still need a lot of work because that descent was just sloppy and awkward.

Thankfully, she's young enough for her anatomy to take the abuse of perfecting that technique by the time the 2024 Olympics rolls around.