TV

The Internet has never been sexier. But you know what? I think I prefer today's version with all the cat and nutshot videos. Don't you agree?

For more viral videos, watch Around the Net on Attack of the Show every weeknight at 7/6c!

"Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! I've never seen anything like that in my life, but I certainly do know that's food.

You see my mouth opening? That's not to express shock or amazement; it's a none-too-subtle way of telling you to put that yummy reddish goodness in my mouth, NOW!"

[Source]

You see, by "rollback" they mean that this bike tends to roll back whenever you get to a steep hill.

Yeah, it WAS $165, but that before the $84 handling fee that comes with interrupting one of the employees' breakroom text-a-thons to fetch the box from the back.

[Via]

It doesn't matter if you're on the clock at your work site. When a man needs to take a bath, he's gonna find a way to get himself clean and pristine.

This method carries the danger of the fire getting too hot and turning this excavator into a giant bowl of testicle soup. However, a pro will time it perfectly, having washed his bits and pieces and be out by the time it boils and they're ready to throw in the linguini.

[Via]

Great. Now, public places around the world will need to make the proper accommodations by installing a third restroom with a visible maple leaf on the door.

With this declaration, the NHL lockout is now officially a case of gender discrimination.

[Source]

On tonight's Attack of the Show, Dave Holmes and Candace Bailey welcome back Steve Yeun from The Walking Dead for news on the season three premiere, Grace Helbig chats with Liam Neeson about Taken 2 and Weston Scott gets a lesson in beer-and-food pairings at Moerlein Lager House! We also investigate how the Seattle police department has incorporated social media into their crime watch and bring you a new Gadget Pr0n review! Tune in tonight 7/6c.

"Move along! There's nothing to see here!

In fact, if you keep staring at us, you won't be seeing anything at all after I rip out your eyes and bite them with my diamond dentures.

You trying to catch her PIN number? How about I jam a pin right in your testicles?

Yeah, that's right. Just keep on walking, motherf**kers."

[Via]

"Maybe you didn't get the memo, sweetheart, but this yard is my territory.

Since you seem oblivious to that fact, I guess I'm just gonna have to make it perfectly clear the only way that I know how."

[Source]

Unlike that other Willy Wonka Chocolate Factory, this one isn't a wonderland of colorful backgrounds and chocolate lakes where children are whisked away by Oompa Loompas for breaking the rules.

Rather, it's one where children are given drugs to see colorful backgrounds, thrown in lakes made from their own chocolate, and are whisked away by creepy European guys with unibrows for breaking profit.

[Via]

If you've got a sense of humor and eyes (as most people tend to), then we sincerely hope you've seen Kristen Schaal's animated counterpart, Louise wreak comedic havoc on Bob's Burgers. If not, then do so immediately, and while you're at it, check out our Attack of the Blog exclusive, Kristen Schaal pics! You'll be happy you did.

• Picture Gallery: Photos of Kristen Schaal from Bob's Burgers

Read More »