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Sports

This dad was momentarily living out an unfulfilled fantasy of being a famous footballer by scoring an impressive, high-impact, devastating goal...off his toddler son's face.

Of course, nothing says "I f**ked up" more than when you have to awkwardly hand your frantically-crying child over to mom and accept defeat in the soccer game that is parenting.

[Via]

Normal Umbrellas Are For Suckers

Baxter
Posted October 9, 2012 - By Joseph Baxter

Normal Umbrellas Are For Suckers

Sure, you could whip-out your p**sy parasol and be like everyone else, if that's what you feel you need to do.

However, this guy knows what's really up. Nothing says "I'm cooler and dryer than you" than sporting your own homegrown super-sized leaves courtesy of plant steroids and the defilement of Mother Nature.

[Via]

Hockey Player Jumps Through Glass

Moye
Posted October 2, 2012 - By Moye Ishimoto

Most people like to celebrate a goal with cheers, a bottle of champagne, maybe a hug or two. This hockey player likes to take things to a whole new side of things. (Get it? Because he's on the other side of the glass now? Get it??)

For more viral videos, watch Around the Net on Attack of the Show every weeknight at 7/6c!

Running Bike Change During Race

Baxter
Posted September 26, 2012 - By Joseph Baxter

While NASCAR drivers have to stop while their pit crew performs maintenance, bike races are apparently a lot smoother when it comes to that process.

These guys certainly need to be quick. Shredded tries and blown engines seem trivial when compared to a broken chain or bad seats which chafe your testicles.

Blink and you'll miss how quickly this emergency mid-race bike-swap occurs.

One-Legged Soccer Player Scores Goal

Baxter
Posted September 25, 2012 - By Joseph Baxter

High School soccer player and member of the U.S. Amputee National Team, Nico Calabria demonstrates that one leg is still more than enough to lay down some ownage on the field with this spectacular goal.

I guess if his opponents really wanted to be petty and press the issue, they'd have his crutches tested for performance-enhancing screws. Thus-far, that does not appear to be the case.

Russian Lumberjack Plays Tree Dominoes

Baxter
Posted September 24, 2012 - By Joseph Baxter

When your only wood-cutting tools are a hammer and a sickle, you're likely looking for more creative methods to efficiently make-up for ground that's lost to your chainsaw-sporting counterparts.

Utilizing a bit of practical geometry or just a bit of vodka-inspired dumb luck, this lumberjack manages to get the most bang for his rubles when it comes to downed trees.

Baseball Fan Trolls A Mouthful

Baxter
Posted September 19, 2012 - By Joseph Baxter

Warning: Obscene Gestures.

This baseball fan who was lucky enough to score a ticket for a behind-the-plate seat decided that this would be his best opportunity to show the world how much he sucks. Or, perhaps, his willingness to take in a double-header.

This may have been a serious case of trolling or just him expressing what he'd rather be doing at the moment.

The Truth About ESPN's John Clayton

Moye
Posted September 10, 2012 - By Moye Ishimoto

Don't let the respectable career as a sports writer and reporter for ESPN fool you. This is the real John Clayton.

For more viral videos, watch Around the Net on Attack of the Show every weeknight at 7/6c!

Message From A Really Excited Viewer

Baxter
Posted September 6, 2012 - By Joseph Baxter

Message From A Really Excited Viewer

Sure, the excitement over the 2012 Summer Olympics has long-passed, but now it's time for the brave and inspirational Paralympians to take center-stage.

Of course, with that attention comes new, enthusiastic fans...like the author of that message.

[Source]

Unnecessary Anatomical Correctness

Baxter
Posted September 4, 2012 - By Joseph Baxter

Unnecessary Anatomical Correctness

When hiring sculptors to create animals for children's merry-go-round rides, it's a good idea to make sure that they're not the type who are inclined to take artistic license and go too realistic.

Rest assured, the children will not be crying because the elephant they were riding didn't sport an exposed baby-maker like a drunken celebrity starlet.

Do we even want to go over and see what those horses are packing?

[Via]

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